It is not working

 I have been kicking this blog post around for a while. I realize it is very depressing to talk about how when the actuality of a situation meets the reality of things just don't work. 

Whether its execution or planning or just the result of trying way to hard to make something happen its just not working. Yes, there is 24 hours in a day and I do not have a team of people to delegate items to but, I did try some of things and its just not working. I have started coloring and sewing and making my own meals but, still the pennies pinched are not propagating like the plan states. 

I exercise and I go to the doctor, I go to the dentist and I get tests run. I am still getting massive migraines which could be blood pressure, sinus pressure or my new favorite perimenopause. I know its been about 84 days but 2024 is turning into a trial of this or that year. 

This is the truth for a lot of things, politics isn't working and policies are not working. The safety net is broken and the barn is catching on fire. We come together and we help out but its not enough. 

I know patience is needed and actually required in times like these but, gosh darn it if it doesn't vex or disappoint me to realize that this is just not working. 

Maybe its the Go Fund Me program for a homeless person that doesn't work, or maybe its the one kid that gets a wheelchair versus the 12 other kids that don't have a new wheelchair. Maybe its the perpetual denial that genocide is taking place and that war mongers are profiting. 

or maybe its the 8 subscribers being called out to me not on a comment on my own youtube channel but on a thread of another channel. 

I don't know but I know its not working.